You’re just so unlucky…
28 JanI recognise the number on my phone, I’ve been waiting, anxiously for this call.
It’s Andrea my breast care nurse. This is what I scribbled down;
It went something like this;
Are you at home?
Is Paul or your Mum with you? (Heart sinks……)
You’re just SOOOOOOO unlucky…Under two percent of patients with DCIS ever experience any further problems.
UNFORTUNATELY – it’s MALIGNANT. INFILTRATING DUCTAL CARCINOMA. DANIEL’s EXCISED AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE FOR NOW. I SHOULD HAVE RADIATION AND HORMONE THERAPY.
It’s a 7mm tumour; 6mm IDC, the other mm is DCIS.
Right, at least we know what we’re dealing with.
I’m not shocked.
I can’t look across the kitchen bench at Paul, I know this is a phone call that will change my life, I have to listen intently and ask as many questions as possible.
The focus then shifts from my life, to talk about my efforts to bring another life to this world.
We had a long talk about fertility issues and the fact I never made it through to egg collection as my ovaries hyper-stimulated on Chlomid. Any further intervention in the form of IVF could be risky due to my positive oestrogen receptor status with this and the last cancer.
Andrea says one day I think you should do it, next day don’t – too risky.. We agree this is the see-saw I’ve been on since first diagnosis – only now the decision is final. The hormone therapy, Tamoxifen, is a five year plan. I’ll be nearly 40, have had two BC diagnoses, and this little body will have been on Tamoxifen for five years. Not forgetting the fact Paul will be 57..I’d really only thought about the child – you know – at best – when Paul’s 60, he/she will only be three..Andrea added, Paul will be getting on – and what if something happens to me? Right, if the gravity of this situation wasn’t clear – there it is. I’ll be sick or dead and he’ll be left with a toddler.
I hesitantly asked whether Daniel was convinced I didn’t need chemo. He only commented on this particular cancer – not my history as such. He didn’t think so, but it’s really a question for the Oncologist. They also encouraged me to get a second opinion. Andrea told me the Oncologist might err on the side of caution and given my history, chemo would cover all bases. I’m 34 with a second breast cancer diagnosis after having my breasts removed.
Shit.
Andrea confirmed my next follow-up appointment with Daniel and the Oncologist in coming days. She asked if I had any questions.
Yes – I can’t speak to Daniel now?
Kate, we’re both in front of the computer just shaking our heads, can’t believe it, you’re just so unlucky…….


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